"I Feel Like I Ate a Greasy, Salt Lick of Death."

Day 22. Last night, I was really bad. Really, really bad. As in going-to-vegan-hell bad. And my body is hating me for it today.

I sabotaged myself from the start. I wanted pizza. So we went to a local pizza place and got a pesto-feta-jalapeno pie. One of my favs. And it was trivia night. So we played and drank two pitchers of beer. Afterwards, for some unknown reason, I decision that I wanted McDonald's. (Why?! WHY?!) I got a Quarter Pounder with Cheese and fries. Ugh. Not only am I a terrible vegan, but apparently also a huge fat ass.

I woke up this morning with the worst stomach ache. My body is in revolt. At this point, I give you complete latitude to judge me.

"You're a Vegan?! I Feel Like I Don't Know You Anymore!"

Day 20. I've been a little bad about keeping up with the blog this past week. There have been a few misses this week:

• I made broccoli mac-n-cheeze on Monday; the recipe was heavy on the nutritional yeast, and I really didn't like it. I ended up having a PB&J sandwich for dinner instead. Chris was more kind and actually had seconds.
• On travel in Tampa Tuesday, I went to Publix to get something to eat. They didn't have any veggie sushi, so I ended up with brown rice-California rolls.
• Last night, I went out with my co-workers for happy hour. When I got to the bar, they had already ordered some cheese dip, which I turned down, explaining that I'm a vegan now. One of my dear friends looks at me and says, "You're a vegan?! I feel like I don't even know you anymore!" All kidding aside, by the time I got home, I was feeling naughty, so Chris and I ended up getting a cheese pizza from the store. Oops.

A few successes, too:

• Chris' grandmother's birthday lunch was actually a buffet with a respectable salad bar, tomato-basil soup, and some rice and broccoli. I didn't have to explain to the hunting, Republican contingent that I no longer partake of the animal flesh.
• In Tampa, I had Greek for lunch. I ordered a grilled vegetable-and-baba ganoush wrap and Greek salad, hold the cheese on both. (Funny, though: I tell the waitress, "No cheese, please." And she replies, "But you want feta, right?" I felt like I was in My Big Fat Greek Wedding, when Toula tells her family that her fiance is a vegetarian, to which the aunt replies, "Okay. I make lamb.").
• Also in Tampa, I had a post-meeting, late-night dinner of miso soup, salad, and veggie sushi. Yum.
• Resisted the urge to have meat on Thursday, and instead, made whole wheat penne with non-meatballs. Disaster averted!

"I'm Sick - Don't Judge Me."

Day Five. I woke up in the middle of the night sick as a dog. Without going into too many details, I threw up all damn day. Yuck.

When I finally felt like I could eat, I tried some miso soup and a piece of toast with Earth Balance spread. That did not go well. I could not keep it down. I was so weak I could barely move. So I laid on the couch and watched a marathon of "Tabatha's Salon Takeover" on Bravo until Chris got home from a coffee meeting. He wanted to know what sounded good to me; he offered to go get me a veggie burger from Yeah! Burger (which I usually adore). That sounded terrible, given the fact that I had a black bean burger last night that didn't make it too far down my digestive tract. The absolute only thing that I thought I could stomach was the good-old, decidedly unvegan Campbell's chicken noodle soup with some saltines. So he ran up to CVS and got me some soup. Lo and behold, it worked. I ate the whole thing, plus the whole sleeve of crackers. And I felt a whole lot better.

Please don't judge me.